10
May
11

Rotten Reviews presents Brainscan

brainscan-poster2

Hey Gang,

Before I begin, let me first apologize for the Year Three hiatus. I am sure most of you heard about the trouble I ran into with my Mac just as 2011 dawned on us. Well, things are back up and running better than ever and I am happy to being you the latest Rotten Review for the 1994, Edward Furlong cyber horror fest, Brainscan!

Brainscan is the tender story of a crippled boy who is into horror movies, grunge rock, plaid shirts and video games. This young man’s name is Michael and he decides to try out the latest in interactive CD-ROM technology called BRAINSCAN. This game of murder turns out to be a little too real for our little Mickey as he learns there is a high cost to murder which includes having to deal with a lame joke spewing villain with an oddly shaped head who goes by the name of Trickster.

Get ready for peeping on the girl next door, bland home decor, annoying best friends named Kyle, Oscar Nominated Actors phoning it in, monsters cocks, fright wigs, cat teeth, gratuitous leg wounds, limping, surprise butt sex, teen angst, name calling, and a TON of Three stooges footage.

It’s the rare horror film with a ZERO body count and brings up some hot button issues as to how much we can blame violent crime on violent entertainment. At the end of the movie, this is all left open for debate. Still, kudos to Brainscan for even bringing it up. I believe you know where I stand on the topic.

Enjoy the latest Rotten Review, Gang! We have a whole lot in store for you in Year Three!

Stay Trashy,

-Root

 


4 Responses to “Rotten Reviews presents Brainscan”


  1. May 11, 2011 at 12:42 am

    This is the only movie I ever walked out on, and I did so with only like 5 minutes left. Until this review I actually had no idea how it ended…

    Thanks for the PTSD.

  2. 3 angiepangiepantsful
    November 27, 2011 at 4:30 am

    How good is Edward Furlong in this? lolololol. shocking.

    • 4 primalroot
      January 7, 2012 at 9:44 am

      You know, I actually really like our current chunky Edward Furlong. The one featured in the “Night of the Demons” remake.


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